England strikes again

So all the boozing, sleeplessness and lack of proper meals over the last couple of weeks has finally caught up with me, and I’ve come down with some lurgi. Since having a tonsillectomy last year I appear to have lost the ability to just have a straightforward cold, and so I find myself susceptible to periods of grottiness which see me shuffling around the house grumbling to myself and just feeling generally lousy. I am mainlining lemon and ginger tea though, so hopefully it’ll all have shunted off before the weekend.

In another stroke of brilliance, I managed to chip my front tooth last night. This is the same tooth that I’ve broken several times before, so it was no startling surprise. What did annoy me, however, was that said tooth has seen no end of bashing from glasses or cupboard doors or, on occasion, other teeth (SWITZ SWOO), over the last few years, and yet it decides that a small piece of chocolate is a force formidable enough to cause it to buckle. Gah.

Anyway, off to the dentist today where upon a conversation – which sadly I am no stranger to – ensued with much amusement on my dentist’s part.

Dentist: Ah, England! It is like we have a competition here!

Me: Ha. Yeah, I guess.

Dentist: It is like the competition for who is the best woman in England.

Me: Yep. That’s the one.

Dentist: Are you the best woman in England then, yes?

Me: Well I guess that’s quite subjective.

Dentist: Well it is your name! So you must be! Miss England is here everybody!

Me: *Forced smile, polite laughter*

Dentist: Ah but yes. Miss England will need a lovely smile. We will fix this and you will smile again. But seriously it will cost you £70.




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